Women in Islam
Versus Women in the Judaeo-Christian Tradition
The Myth &
The Reality
Dr. Sherif
Abdel Azeem
INTRODUCTION
Five years ago,
I read in the Toronto Star issue of July 3, 1990 an article titled "Islam
is not alone in patriarchal doctrines", by Gwynne Dyer. The article described
the furious reactions of the participants of a conference on women and power
held in Montreal to the comments of the famous Egyptian feminist Dr. Nawal
Sadawi. Her "politically incorrect" statements included: "the
most restrictive elements towards women can be found first in Judaism in the
Old Testament then in Christianity and then in the Quran"; "all
religions are patriarchal because they stem from patriarchal societies";
and "veiling of women is not a specifically Islamic practice but an
ancient cultural heritage with analogies in sister religions". The
participants could not bear sitting around while their faiths were being
equated with Islam. Thus, Dr. Sadawi received a barrage of criticism. "Dr.
Sadawi's comments are unacceptable. Her answers reveal a lack of understanding
about other people's faiths," declared Bernice Dubois of the World
Movement of Mothers. "I must protest" said panellist Alice Shalvi of
Israel women's network, "there is no conception of the veil in Judaism."
The article attributed these furious protests to the strong tendency in the
West to scapegoat Islam for practices that are just as much a part of the
West's own cultural heritage. "Christian and Jewish feminists were not
going to sit around being discussed in the same category as those wicked
Muslims," wrote Gwynne Dyer.
I was not
surprised that the conference participants had held such a negative view of
Islam, especially when women's issues were involved. In the West, Islam is
believed to be the symbol of the subordination of women par excellence. In
order to understand how firm this belief is, it is enough to mention that the
Minister of Education in France, the land of Voltaire, has recently ordered the
expulsion of all young Muslim women wearing the veil from French schools! A
young Muslim student wearing a headscarf is denied her right of education in
France, while a Catholic student wearing a cross or a Jewish student wearing a
skullcap is not. The scene of French policemen preventing young Muslim women
wearing headscarves from entering their high school is unforgettable. It
inspires the memories of another equally disgraceful scene of Governor George
Wallace of Alabama in 1962 standing in front of a school gate trying to block
the entrance of black students in order to prevent the desegregation of
Alabama's schools. The difference between the two scenes is that the black
students had the sympathy of so many people in the U.S. and in the whole world.
President Kennedy sent the U.S. National Guard to force the entry of the black
students. The Muslim girls, on the other hand, received no help from any one.
Their cause seems to have very little sympathy either inside or outside France.
The reason is the widespread misunderstanding and fear of anything Islamic in
the world today.
What intrigued
me the most about the Montreal conference was one question: Were the statements
made by Sadawi, or any of her critics, factual? In other words, do Judaism,
Christianity, and Islam have the same conception of women? Are they different in
their conceptions? Do Judaism and Christianity truly offer women a better
treatment than Islam does? What is the Truth?
It is not easy
to search for and find answers to these difficult questions. The first
difficulty is that one has to be fair and objective or, at least, do one's
utmost to be so. This is what Islam teaches. The Quran has instructed Muslims
to say the truth even if those who are very close to them do not like it:
"Whenever
you speak, speak justly, even if a near relative is concerned." [Noble
Quran 6:152]
"O you who
believe stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against
yourselves, or your parents or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or
poor." [Noble Quran 4:135]
The other great
difficulty is the overwhelming breadth of the subject. Therefore, during the
last few years, I have spent many hours reading the Bible, The Encyclopedia of
Religion, and the Encyclopedia Judaica searching for answers. I have also read
several books discussing the position of women in different religions written
by scholars, apologists, and critics. The material presented in the following
chapters represents the important findings of this humble research. I don't
claim to be absolutely objective. This is beyond my limited capacity. All I can
say is that I have been trying, throughout this research, to approach the
Quranic ideal of "speaking justly".
I would like to
emphasize in this introduction that my purpose for this study is not to
denigrate Judaism or Christianity. As Muslims, we believe in the divine origins
of both. No one can be a Muslim without believing in Moses and Jesus as great
prophets of God. My goal is only to vindicate Islam and pay a tribute, long
overdue in the West, to the final truthful Message from God to the human race.
I would also like to emphasize that I concerned myself only with Doctrine. That
is, my concern is, mainly, the position of women in the three religions as it
appears in their original sources not as practiced by their millions of
followers in the world today. Therefore, most of the evidence cited comes from
the Quran, the sayings of Prophet Muhammad, the Bible, the Talmud, and the
sayings of some of the most influential Church Fathers whose views have
contributed immeasurably to defining and shaping Christianity. This interest in
the sources relates to the fact that understanding a certain religion from the
attitudes and the behavior of some of its nominal followers is misleading. Many
people confuse culture with religion, many others do not know what their
religious books are saying, and many others do not even care.
EVE'S FAULT?
The three
religions agree on one basic fact: Both women and men are created by God, The
Creator of the whole universe. However, disagreement starts soon after the
creation of the first man, Adam, and the first woman, Eve. The Judaeo-Christian
conception of the creation of Adam and Eve is narrated in detail in Genesis
2:4-3:24. God prohibited both of them from eating the fruits of the forbidden
tree. The serpent seduced Eve to eat from it and Eve, in turn, seduced Adam to
eat with her. When God rebuked Adam for what he did, he put all the blame on
Eve, "The woman you put here with me --she gave me some fruit from the
tree and I ate it." Consequently, God said to Eve:
"I will
greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to
children. Your desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you."
To Adam He
said:
"Because
you listened to your wife and ate from the tree .... Cursed is the ground
because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your
life..."
The Islamic
conception of the first creation is found in several places in the Quran, for
example:
"O Adam
dwell with your wife in the Garden and enjoy as you wish but approach not this
tree or you run into harm and transgression. Then Satan whispered to them in
order to reveal to them their shame that was hidden from them and he said:
'Your Lord only forbade you this tree lest you become angels or such beings as live
forever.' And he swore to them both that he was their sincere adviser. So by
deceit he brought them to their fall: when they tasted the tree their shame
became manifest to them and they began to sew together the leaves of the Garden
over their bodies. And their Lord called unto them: 'Did I not forbid you that
tree and tell you that Satan was your avowed enemy?' They said: 'Our Lord we
have wronged our own souls and if You forgive us not and bestow not upon us
Your Mercy, we shall certainly be lost'." [Noble Quran 7:19-23]
A careful look
into the two accounts of the story of the Creation reveals some essential
differences. The Quran, contrary to the Bible, places equal blame on both Adam
and Eve for their mistake. Nowhere in the Quran can one find even the slightest
hint that Eve tempted Adam to eat from the tree or even that she had eaten
before him. Eve in the Quran is no temptress, no seducer, and no deceiver.
Moreover, Eve is not to be blamed for the pains of childbearing. God, according
to the Quran, punishes no one for another's faults. Both Adam and Eve committed
a sin and then asked God for forgiveness and He forgave them both.
EVE'S LEGACY
The image of
Eve as temptress in the Bible has resulted in an extremely negative impact on
women throughout the Judaeo-Christian tradition. All women were believed to
have inherited from their mother, the Biblical Eve, both her guilt and her
guile. Consequently, they were all untrustworthy, morally inferior, and wicked.
Menstruation, pregnancy, and childbearing were considered the just punishment
for the eternal guilt of the cursed female sex. In order to appreciate how
negative the impact of the Biblical Eve was on all her female descendants we
have to look at the writings of some of the most important Jews and Christians
of all time. Let us start with the Old Testament and look at excerpts from what
is called the Wisdom Literature in which we find:
"I find
more bitter than death the woman who is a snare, whose heart is a trap and
whose hands are chains. The man who pleases God will escape her, but the sinner
she will ensnare....while I was still searching but not finding, I found one
upright man among a thousand but not one upright woman among them all."
[Ecclesiastes 7:26-28]
In another part
of the Hebrew literature which is found in the Catholic Bible we read:
"No
wickedness comes anywhere near the wickedness of a woman.....Sin began with a
woman and thanks to her we all must die." [Ecclesiasticus 25:19,24]
Jewish Rabbis
listed nine curses inflicted on women as a result of the Fall:
"To the
woman He gave nine curses and death: the burden of the blood of menstruation
and the blood of virginity; the burden of pregnancy; the burden of childbirth;
the burden of bringing up the children; her head is covered as one in mourning;
she pierces her ear like a permanent slave or slave girl who serves her master;
she is not to be believed as a witness; and after everything--death." [2]
To the present
day, orthodox Jewish men in their daily morning prayer recite "Blessed be
God King of the universe that Thou has not made me a woman." The women, on
the other hand, thank God every morning for "making me according to Thy
will." [3] Another prayer found in many Jewish prayer books: "Praised
be God that he has not created me a gentile. Praised be God that he has not
created me a woman. Praised be God that he has not created me an
ignoramus." [4]
The Biblical
Eve has played a far bigger role in Christianity than in Judaism. Her sin has
been pivotal to the whole Christian faith because the Christian conception of
the reason for the mission of Jesus Christ on Earth stems from Eve's
disobedience to God. She had sinned and then seduced Adam to follow her suit.
Consequently, God expelled both of them from Heaven to Earth, which had been
cursed because of them. They bequeathed their sin, which had not been forgiven
by God, to all their descendants and, thus, all humans are born in sin. In
order to purify human beings from their 'original sin', God had to sacrifice
Jesus, who is considered to be the Son of God, on the cross. Therefore, Eve is
responsible for her own mistake, her husband's sin, the original sin of all
humanity, and the death of the Son of God. In other words, one woman acting on
her own caused the fall of humanity. [5] What about her daughters? They are
sinners like her and have to be treated as such. Listen to the severe tone of
St. Paul in the New Testament:
"A woman
should learn in quietness and full submission. I don't permit a woman to teach
or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first,
then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived
and became a sinner." [I Timothy 2:11-14]
St. Tertullian
was even more blunt than St. Paul, while he was talking to his 'best beloved
sisters' in the faith, he said:[6]
"Do you
not know that you are each an Eve? The sentence of God on this sex of yours
lives in this age: the guilt must of necessity live too. You are the Devil's
gateway: You are the un-sealer of the forbidden tree: You are the first
deserter of the divine law: You are she who persuaded him whom the devil was
not valiant enough to attack. You destroyed so easily God's image, man. On
account of your desert even the Son of God had to die."
St. Augustine
was faithful to the legacy of his predecessors, he wrote to a friend:
"What is
the difference whether it is in a wife or a mother, it is still Eve the
temptress that we must beware of in any woman......I fail to see what use woman
can be to man, if one excludes the function of bearing children."
Centuries
later, St. Thomas Aquinas still considered women as defective:
"As
regards the individual nature, woman is defective and misbegotten, for the
active force in the male seed tends to the production of a perfect likeness in
the masculine sex; while the production of woman comes from a defect in the
active force or from some material indisposition, or even from some external
influence."
Finally, the
renowned reformer Martin Luther could not see any benefit from a woman but
bringing into the world as many children as possible regardless of any side
effects:
"If they
become tired or even die, that does not matter. Let them die in childbirth,
that's why they are there"
Again and again
all women are denigrated because of the image of Eve the temptress, thanks to
the Genesis account. To sum up, the Judaeo-Christian conception of women has
been poisoned by the belief in the sinful nature of Eve and her female
offspring.
If we now turn
our attention to what the Quran has to say about women, we will soon realize
that the Islamic conception of women is radically different from the
Judaeo-Christian one. Let the Quran speak for itself:
"For
Muslim men and women, for believing men and women, for devout men and women,
for true men and women, for men and women who are patient, for men and women
who humble themselves, for men and women who give in charity, for men and women
who fast, for men and women who guard their chastity, and for men and women who
engage much in Allah's praise-- For them all has Allah prepared forgiveness and
great reward" [Noble Quran 33:35]
"The
believers, men and women, are protectors, one of another: they enjoin what is
just, and forbid what is evil, they observe regular prayers, practice regular
charity, and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them will Allah pour His Mercy:
for Allah is Exalted in power, Wise" [Noble Quran 9:71]
"And their
Lord answered them: Truly I will never cause to be lost the work of any of you,
Be you a male or female, you are members one of another" [Noble Quran
3:195]
"Whoever
works evil will not be requited but by the like thereof, and whoever works a
righteous deed -whether man or woman- and is a believer- such will enter the
Garden of bliss" [Noble Quran 40:40]
"Whoever
works righteousness, man or woman, and has faith, verily to him/her we will
give a new life that is good and pure, and we will bestow on such their reward
according to the best of their actions" [Noble Quran 16:97]
It is clear
that the Quranic view of women is no different than that of men. They, both,
are God's creatures whose sublime goal on earth is to worship their Lord, do
righteous deeds, and avoid evil and they, both, will be assessed accordingly.
The Quran never mentions that the woman is the devil's gateway or that she is a
deceiver by nature. The Quran, also, never mentions that man is God's image;
all men and all women are his creatures, that is all. According to the Quran, a
woman's role on earth is not limited only to childbirth. She is required to do
as many good deeds as any other man is required to do. The Quran never says
that no upright women have ever existed. To the contrary, the Quran has
instructed all the believers, women as well as men, to follow the example of
those ideal women such as the Virgin Mary and the Pharaoh's wife:
"And Allah
sets forth, As an example to those who believe, the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she
said: 'O my lord build for me, in nearness to you, a mansion in the Garden, and
save me from Pharaoh and his doings and save me from those who do wrong.' And
Mary the daughter of 'Imran who guarded her chastity and We breathed into her
body of Our spirit; and she testified to the truth of the words of her Lord and
of His revelations and was one of the devout" [Noble Quran 66:11-13]
SHAMEFUL
DAUGHTERS?
In fact, the
difference between the Biblical and the Quranic attitude towards the female sex
starts as soon as a female is born. For example, the Bible states that the
period of the mother's ritual impurity is twice as long if a girl is born than
if a boy is (Lev. 12:2-5). The Catholic Bible states explicitly that:
"The birth
of a daughter is a loss." [Ecclesiasticus 22:3]
In contrast to
this shocking statement, boys receive special praise:
"A man who
educates his son will be the envy of his enemy." [Ecclesiasticus 30:3]
Jewish Rabbis
made it an obligation on Jewish men to produce offspring in order to propagate
the race. At the same time, they did not hide their clear preference for male
children: "It is well for those whose children are male but ill for those
whose are female", "At the birth of a boy, all are joyful...at the
birth of a girl all are sorrowful", and "When a boy comes into the
world, peace comes into the world... When a girl comes, nothing comes."
[7]
A daughter is
considered a painful burden, a potential source of shame to her father:
"Your
daughter is headstrong? Keep a sharp look-out that she does not make you the
laughing stock of your enemies, the talk of the town, the object of common
gossip, and put you to public shame" [Ecclesiasticus 42:11]
"Keep a
headstrong daughter under firm control, or she will abuse any indulgence she
receives. Keep a strict watch on her shameless eye, do not be surprised if she
disgraces you" [Ecclesiasticus 26:10-11]
It was this
very same idea of treating daughters as sources of shame that led the pagan
Arabs, before the advent of Islam, to practice female infanticide. The Quran
severely condemned this heinous practice:
"When news
is brought to one of them of the birth of a female child, his face darkens and
he is filled with inward grief. With shame does he hide himself from his people
because of the bad news he has had! Shall he retain her on contempt or bury her
in the dust? Ah! What an evil they decide on?" [Noble Quran 16:59]
It has to be
mentioned that this sinister crime would have never stopped in Arabia were it
not for the power of the scathing terms the Quran used to condemn this practice
[16:59, 43:17, 81:8-9]
The Quran,
moreover, makes no distinction between boys and girls. In contrast to the
Bible, the Quran considers the birth of a female as a gift and a blessing from
God, the same as the birth of a male. The Quran even mentions the gift of the
female birth first:
"To Allah
belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He
bestows female children to whomever He wills and bestows male children to
whomever He wills" [Noble Quran 42:49]
In order to
wipe out all the traces of female infanticide in the nascent Muslim society,
Prophet Muhammad promised those who were blessed with daughters of a great
reward if they would bring them up kindly:
"He who is
involved in bringing up daughters, and accords benevolent treatment towards
them, they will be protection for him against Hell-Fire." [Bukhari and
Muslim]
"Whoever
maintains two girls till they attain maturity, he and I will come on the
Resurrection Day like this; and he joined his fingers." [Muslim]
FEMALE
EDUCATION?
The difference
between the Biblical and the Quranic conceptions of women is not limited to the
newly born female, it extends far beyond that. Let us compare their attitudes
towards a female trying to learn her religion. The heart of Judaism is the
Torah, the law. However, according to the Talmud, "women are exempt from
the study of the Torah." Some Jewish Rabbis firmly declared "Let the
words of Torah rather be destroyed by fire than imparted to women", and
"Whoever teaches his daughter Torah is as though he taught her
obscenity" [8]
The attitude of
St. Paul in the New Testament is not brighter:
"As in all
the congregations of the saints, women should remain silent in the churches.
They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission as the law says. If
they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at
home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church." [I
Corinthians 14:34-35]
How can a woman
learn if she is not allowed to speak? How can a woman grow intellectually if
she is obliged to be in a state of full submission? How can she broaden her
horizons if her one and only source of information is her husband at home?
Now, to be
fair, we should ask: is the Quranic position any different? One short story
narrated in the Quran sums its position up concisely. Khawlah was a Muslim
woman whose husband Aws pronounced this statement at a moment of anger:
"You are to me as the back of my mother." This was held by pagan
Arabs to be a statement of divorce which freed the husband from any conjugal
responsibility but did not leave the wife free to leave the husband's home or
to marry another man. Having heard these words from her husband, Khawlah was in
a miserable situation. She went straight to the Prophet of Islam to plead her
case. The Prophet was of the opinion that she should be patient since there
seemed to be no way out. Khawlah kept arguing with the Prophet in an attempt to
save her suspended marriage. Shortly, the Quran intervened; Khawlah's plea was
accepted. The divine verdict abolished this iniquitous custom. One full chapter
(Chapter 58) of the Quran whose title is "Al-mujadilah" or "The
woman who is arguing" was named after this incident:
"Allah has
heard and accepted the statement of the woman who pleads with you (the Prophet)
concerning her husband and carries her complaint to Allah, and Allah hears the
arguments between both of you for Allah hears and sees all things...."
[Noble Quran 58:1]
A woman in the
Quranic conception has the right to argue even with the Prophet of Islam
himself. No one has the right to instruct her to be silent. She is under no
obligation to consider her husband the one and only reference in matters of law
and religion.
UNCLEAN IMPURE
WOMAN?
Jewish laws and
regulations concerning menstruating women are extremely restrictive. The Old
Testament considers any menstruating woman as unclean and impure. Moreover, her
impurity "infects" others as well. Anyone or anything she touches
becomes unclean for a day:
"When a
woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will
last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening.
Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits
on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe
with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she
sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till
evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting on, when anyone
touches it, he will be unclean till evening." [Lev. 15:19-23]
Due to her
"contaminating" nature, a menstruating woman was sometimes
"banished" in order to avoid any possibility of any contact with her.
She was sent to a special house called "the house of uncleanness" for
the whole period of her impurity. [9] The Talmud considers a menstruating woman
"fatal" even without any physical contact:
"Our
Rabbis taught: ...if a menstruating woman passes between two (men), if it is at
the beginning of her menses she will slay one of them, and if it is at the end
of her menses she will cause strife between them." [bPes. 111a]
Furthermore,
the husband of a menstruous woman was forbidden to enter the synagogue if he
had been made unclean by her even by the dust under her feet. A priest whose
wife, daughter, or mother was menstruating could not recite priestly blessing
in the synagogue. [10] No wonder many Jewish women still refer to menstruation
as "the curse." [11]
Islam does not
consider a menstruating woman to possess any kind of "contagious
uncleanness". She is neither "untouchable" nor
"cursed." She practices her normal life with only one restriction: A
married couple are not allowed to have sexual intercourse during the period of
menstruation. Any other physical contact between them is permissible. A
menstruating woman is exempted from some rituals such as daily prayers and
fasting during her period.
BEARING WITNESS
Another issue
in which the Quran and the Bible disagree is the issue of women bearing
witness. It is true that the Quran has instructed the believers dealing in
financial transactions to get two male witnesses or one male and two females
[2:282] However, it is also true that the Quran in other situations accepts the
testimony of a woman as equal to that of a man. In fact the woman's testimony
can even invalidate the man's. If a man accuses his wife of unchastity, he is
required by the Quran to solemnly swear five times as evidence of the wife's
guilt. If the wife denies and swears similarly five times, she is not
considered guilty and in either case the marriage is dissolved. [24:6-11]
On the other
hand, women were not allowed to bear witness in early Jewish society.[12] The
Rabbis counted women's not being able to bear witness among the nine curses
inflicted upon all women because of the Fall (see the "Eve's Legacy"
section). Women in today's Israel are not allowed to give evidence in
Rabbinical courts. The Rabbis justify why women cannot bear witness by citing
Genesis 18:9-16, where it is stated that Sara, Abraham's wife had lied. The
Rabbis use this incident as evidence that women are unqualified to bear
witness. It should be noted here that this story narrated in Genesis [18:9-16]
has been mentioned more than once in the Quran without any hint of any lies by
Sara[11:69-74, 51:24-30]. In the Christian West, both ecclesiastical and civil
law debarred women from giving testimony until late last century.[14]
If a man
accuses his wife of unchastity, her testimony will not be considered at all
according to the Bible. The accused wife has to be subjected to a trial by
ordeal. In this trial, the wife faces a complex and humiliating ritual which
was supposed to prove her guilt or innocence [Num. 5:11-31]. If she is found
guilty after this ordeal, she will be sentenced to death. If she is found not
guilty, her husband will be innocent of any wrongdoing.
Besides, if a
man takes a woman as a wife and then accuses her of not being a virgin, her own
testimony will not count. Her parents had to bring evidence of her virginity
before the elders of the town. If the parents could not prove the innocence of
their daughter, she would be stoned to death on her father's doorsteps. If the
parents were able to prove her innocence, the husband would only be fined one
hundred shekels of silver and he could not divorce his wife as long as he
lived:
"If a man
takes a wife and, after lying with her, dislikes her and slanders her and gives
her a bad name, saying, 'I married this woman, but when I approached her, I did
not find proof of her virginity,' then the girl's father and mother shall bring
proof that she was a virgin to the town elders at the gate. The girl's father
will say to the elders, 'I gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he
dislikes her. Now he has slandered her and said I did not find your daughter to
be a virgin. But here is the proof of my daughter's virginity.' Then her
parents shall display the cloth before the elders of the town, and the elders
shall take the man and punish him. They shall fine him a hundred shekels of
silver and give them to the girl's father, because this man has given an
Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue to be his wife; he must not
divorce her as long as he lives. If, however, the charge is true and no proof
of the girl's virginity can be found, she shall be brought to the door of her
father's house and there the men of the town shall stone her to death. She has
done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while still in her
father's house. You must purge the evil from among you." [Deuter nomy
22:13-21]
ADULTERY
Adultery is
considered a sin in all religions. The Bible decrees the death sentence for
both the adulterer and the adulteress [Lev. 20:10]
Islam also
equally punishes both the adulterer and the adulteress. [24:2]
However, the
Quranic definition of adultery is very different from the Biblical definition.
Adultery, according to the Quran, is the involvement of a married man or a
married woman in an extramarital affair. The Bible only considers the
extramarital affair of a married woman as adultery. [Leviticus 20:10,
Deuteronomy 22:22, Proverbs 6:20-7:27]
"If a man
is found sleeping with another man's wife, both the man who slept with her and
the woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel" [Deut. 22:22]
"If a man
commits adultery with another man's wife both the adulterer and the adulteress
must be put to death." [Lev. 20:10]
According to
the Biblical definition, if a married man sleeps with an unmarried woman, this
is not considered a crime at all. The married man who has extramarital affairs
with unmarried women is not an adulterer and the unmarried women involved with
him are not adulteresses. The crime of adultery is committed only when a man,
whether married or single, sleeps with a married woman. In this case the man is
considered adulterer, even if he is not married, and the woman is considered
adulteress. In short, adultery is any illicit sexual intercourse involving a
married woman. The extramarital affair of a married man is not per se a crime
in the Bible. Why is the dual moral standard? According to Encyclopedia
Judaica, the wife was considered to be the husband's possession and adultery
constituted a violation of the husband's exclusive right to her; the wife as
the husband's possession had no such right to him. [15] That is, if a man had
sexual intercourse with a married woman, he would be violating the property of
another man and, thus, he should be punished.
To the present
day in Israel, if a married man indulges in an extramarital affair with an
unmarried woman, his children by that woman are considered legitimate. But, if
a married woman has an affair with another man, whether married or not married,
her children by that man are not only illegitimate but they are considered
bastards and are forbidden to marry any other Jews except converts and other
bastards. This ban is handed down to the children's descendants for 10
generations until the taint of adultery is presumably weakened. [16]
The Quran, on
the other hand, never considers any woman to be the possession of any man. The
Quran eloquently describes the relationship between the spouses by saying:
"And among
His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may
dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your
hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect" [Noble Quran
30:21]
This is the
Quranic conception of marriage: love, mercy, and tranquility, not possession
and double standards.
VOWS
According to
the Bible, a man must fulfill any vows he might make to God. He must not break
his word. On the other hand, a woman's vow is not necessarily binding on her.
It has to be approved by her father, if she is living in his house, or by her
husband, if she is married. If a father/husband does not endorse his
daughter's/wife's vows, all pledges made by her become null and void:
"But if
her father forbids her when he hears about it, none of her vows or the pledges
by which she obligated herself will stand ....Her husband may confirm or
nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself" [Num.
30:2-15]
Why is it that
a woman's word is not binding per se? The answer is simple: because she is
owned by her father, before marriage, or by her husband after marriage. The
father's control over his daughter was absolute to the extent that, should he
wish, he could sell her! It is indicated in the writings of the Rabbis that:
"The man may sell his daughter, but the woman may not sell her daughter;
the man may betroth his daughter, but the woman may not betroth her daughter.
[17] The Rabbinic literature also indicates that marriage represents the
transfer of control from the father to the husband: "betrothal, making a
woman the sacrosanct possession--the inviolable property-- of the
husband..." Obviously, if the woman is considered to be the property of
someone else, she cannot make any pledges that her owner does not approve of.
It is of
interest to note that this Biblical instruction concerning women's vows has had
negative repercussions on Judaeo-Christian women till early in this century. A
married woman in the Western world had no legal status. No act of hers was of
any legal value. Her husband could repudiate any contract, bargain, or deal she
had made. Women in the West (the largest heir of the Judaeo-Christian legacy)
were held unable to make a binding contract because they were practically owned
by someone else. Western women had suffered for almost two thousand years
because of the Biblical attitude towards women's position vis-à-vis their
fathers and husbands. [18]
In Islam, the
vow of every Muslim, male or female, is binding on him/her. No one has the
power to repudiate the pledges of anyone else. Failure to keep a solemn oath,
made by a man or a woman, has to be expiated as indicated in the Quran:
"He [God]
will call you to account for your deliberate oaths: for expiation, feed ten
indigent persons, on a scale of the average for the food of your families; Or
clothe them; or give a slave his freedom. If that is beyond your means, fast
for three days. That is the expiation for the oaths you have sworn. But keep
your oaths." [Noble Quran 5:89]
Companions of
the Prophet Muhammad, men and women, used to present their oath of allegiance
to him personally. Women, as well as men, would independently come to him and
pledge their oaths:
"O
Prophet, When believing women come to you to make a covenant with you that they
will not associate in worship anything with God, nor steal, nor fornicate, nor
kill their own children, nor slander anyone, nor disobey you in any just
matter, then make a covenant with them and pray to God for the forgiveness of
their sins. Indeed God is Forgiving and most Merciful." [Noble Quran
60:12]
A man could not
swear the oath on behalf of his daughter or his wife. Nor could a man repudiate
the oath made by any of his female relatives.
WIFE'S
PROPERTY?
The three
religions share an unshakeable belief in the importance of marriage and family
life. They also agree on the leadership of the husband over the family.
Nevertheless, blatant differences do exist among the three religions with
respect to the limits of this leadership. The Judaeo-Christian tradition,
unlike Islam, virtually extends the leadership of the husband into ownership of
his wife.
The Jewish
tradition regarding the husband's role towards his wife stems from the
conception that he owns her as he owns his slave. [19] This conception has been
the reason behind the double standard in the laws of adultery and behind the
husband's ability to annul his wife's vows. This conception has also been responsible
for denying the wife any control over her property or her earnings. As soon as
a Jewish woman got married, she completely lost any control over her property
and earnings to her husband. Jewish Rabbis asserted the husband's right to his
wife's property as a corollary of his possession of her: "Since one has
come into the possession of the woman does it not follow that he should come
into the possession of her property too?", and "Since he has acquired
the woman should he not acquire also her property?" [20] Thus, marriage
caused the richest woman to become practically penniless. The Talmud describes
the financial situation of a wife as follows:
"How can a
woman have anything; whatever is hers belongs to her husband? What is his is
his and what is hers is also his...... Her earnings and what she may find in
the streets are also his. The household articles, even the crumbs of bread on
the table, are his. Should she invite a guest to her house and feed him, she
would be stealing from her husband..." [San. 71a, Git. 62a]
The fact of the
matter is that the property of a Jewish female was meant to attract suitors. A
Jewish family would assign their daughter a share of her father's estate to be
used as a dowry in case of marriage. It was this dowry that made Jewish
daughters an unwelcome burden to their fathers. The father had to raise his
daughter for years and then prepare for her marriage by providing a large
dowry. Thus, a girl in a Jewish family was a liability and no asset. [21] This
liability explains why the birth of a daughter was not celebrated with joy in
the old Jewish society (see the "Shameful Daughters?" section). The
dowry was the wedding gift presented to the groom under terms of tenancy. The
husband would act as the practical owner of the dowry but he could not sell it.
The bride would lose any control over the dowry at the moment of marriage.
Moreover, she was expected to work after marriage and all her earnings had to
go to her husband in return for her maintenance which was his obligation. She
could regain her property only in two cases: divorce or her husband's death.
Should she die first, he would inherit her property. In the case of the
husband's death, the wife could regain her pre-marital property but she was not
entitled to inherit any share in her deceased husband's own property. It has to
be added that the groom also had to present a marriage gift to his bride, yet
againhe was the practical owner of this gift as long as they were married.[22]
Christianity,
until recently, has followed the same Jewish tradition. Both religious and
civil authorities in the Christian Roman Empire (after Constantine) required a
property agreement as a condition for recognizing the marriage. Families
offered their daughters increasing dowries and, as a result, men tended to
marry earlier while families postponed their daughters' marriages until later
than had been customary.[23] Under Canon law, a wife was entitled to
restitution of her dowry if the marriage was annulled unless she was guilty of
adultery. In this case, she forfeited her right to the dowry which remained in
her husband's hands.[24] Under Canon and civil law a married woman in Christian
Europe and America had lost her property rights until late nineteenth and early
twentieth centuries. For example, women's rights under English law were
compiled and published in 1632. These 'rights' included: "That which the
husband hath is his own. That which the wife hath is the husband's.[25] The
wife not only lost her property upon marriage, she lost her personality as
well. No act of her was of legal value. Her husband could repudiate any sale or
gift made by her as being of no binding legal value. The person with whom she
had any contract was held as a criminal for participating in a fraud. Moreover,
she could not sue or be sued in her own name, nor could she sue her own
husband.[26] A married woman was practically treated as an infant in the eyes
of the law. The wife simply belonged to her husband and therefore she lost her
property, her legal personality, and her family name.[27]
Islam, since
the seventh century C.E., has granted married women the independent personality
which the Judaeo-Christian West had deprived them until very recently. In
Islam, the bride and her family are under no obligation whatsoever to present a
gift to the groom. The girl in a Muslim family is no liability. A woman is so
dignified by Islam that she does not need to present gifts in order to attract
potential husbands. It is the groom who must present the bride with a marriage
gift. This gift is considered her property and neither the groom nor the
bride's family have any share in or control over it. In some Muslim societies
today, a marriage gift of a hundred thousand dollars in diamonds is not
unusual.[28] The bride retains her marriage gifts even if she is later
divorced. The husband is not allowed any share in his wife's property except
what she offers him with her free consent.[29] The Quran has stated its
position on this issue quite clearly:
"And give
the women (on marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they, Of their own
good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it and enjoy it with right
good cheer" [Noble Quran 4:4]
The wife's
property and earnings are under her full control and for her use alone since
her, and the children's, maintenance is her husband's responsibility.[30] No
matter how rich the wife might be, she is not obliged to act as a co-provider
for the family unless she herself voluntarily chooses to do so. Spouses do
inherit from one another. Moreover, a married woman in Islam retains her
independent legal personality and her family name.[31] An American judge once
commented on the rights of Muslim women saying: " A Muslim girl may marry
ten times, but her individuality is not absorbed by that of her various
husbands. She is a solar planet with a name and legal personality of her
own."[32]
DIVORCE
The three
religions have remarkable differences in their attitudes towards divorce.
Christianity abhors divorce altogether. The New Testament unequivocally
advocates the indissolubility of marriage. It is attributed to Jesus to have
said, "But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for
marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become adulteress, and anyone who marries
the divorced woman commits adultery." [Matthew 5:32] This uncompromising
ideal is, without a doubt, unrealistic. It assumes a state of moral perfection
that human societies have never achieved. When a couple realizes that their
married life is beyond repair, a ban on divorce will not do them any good.
Forcing ill-mated couples to remain together against their wills is neither
effective nor reasonable. No wonder the whole Christian world has been obliged
to sanction divorce.
Judaism, on the
other hand, allows divorce even without any cause. The Old Testament gives the
husband the right to divorce his wife even if he just dislikes her:
"If a man
marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something
indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her
and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the
wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a
certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he
dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her
again after she has been defiled." [Deut. 24:1-4]
The above
verses have caused some considerable debate among Jewish scholars because of
their disagreement over the interpretation of the words
"displeasing", "indecency", and "dislikes"
mentioned in the verses. The Talmud records their different opinions:
"The
school of Shammai held that a man should not divorce his wife unless he has
found her guilty of some sexual misconduct, while the school of Hillel say he
may divorce her even if she has merely spoiled a dish for him. Rabbi Akiba says
he may divorce her even if he simply finds another woman more beautiful than
she." [Gittin 90a-b]
The New
Testament follows the Shammaites opinion while Jewish law has followed the
opinion of the Hillelites and R. Akiba. [33] Since the Hillelites view prevailed,
it became the unbroken tradition of Jewish law to give the husband freedom to
divorce his wife without any cause at all. The Old Testament not only gives the
husband the right to divorce his "displeasing" wife, it considers
divorcing a "bad wife" an obligation:
"A bad
wife brings humiliation, downcast looks, and a wounded heart. Slack of hand and
weak of knee is the man whose wife fails to make him happy. Woman is the origin
of sin, and it is through her that we all die. Do not leave a leaky cistern to
drip or allow a bad wife to say what she likes. If she does not accept your
control, divorce her and send her away." [Ecclesiasticus 25:25]
The Talmud has
recorded several specific actions by wives which obliged their husbands to
divorce them: "If she ate in the street, if she drank greedily in the
street, if she suckled in the street, in every case Rabbi Meir says that she
must leave her husband" [Git. 89a] The Talmud has also made it mandatory
to divorce a barren wife (who bore no children in a period of ten years):
"Our Rabbis taught: If a man took a wife and lived with her for ten years
and she bore no child, he shall divorce her." [Yeb. 64a]
Wives, on the
other hand, cannot initiate divorce under Jewish law. A Jewish wife, however,
could claim the right to a divorce before a Jewish court provided that a strong
reason exists. Very few grounds are provided for the wife to make a claim for a
divorce. These grounds include: A husband with physical defects or skin
disease, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal responsibilities, etc. The Court
might support the wife's claim to a divorce but it cannot dissolve the
marriage. Only the husband can dissolve the marriage by giving his wife a bill
of divorce. The Court could scourge, fine, imprison, and excommunicate him to
force him to deliver the necessary bill of divorce to his wife. However, if the
husband is stubborn enough, he can refuse to grant his wife a divorce and keep
her tied to him indefinitely. Worse still, he can desert her without granting
her a divorce and leave her unmarried and un-divorced. He can marry another
woman or even live with any single woman out of wedlock and have children from
her (these children are considered legitimate under Jewish law). The deserted
wife, on the other hand, cannot marry any other man since she is still legally
married and she cannot live with any other man because she will be considered
an adulteress and her children from this union will be illegitimate for ten
generations. A woman in such a position is called an agunah (chained woman).
[34] In the United States today there are approximately 1000 to 1500 Jewish
women who are agunot (plural for agunah), while in Israel their number might be
as high as 16000. Husbands may extort thousands of dollars from their trapped
wives in exchange for a Jewish divorce. [35]
Islam occupies
the middle ground between Christianity and Judaism with respect to divorce.
Marriage in Islam is a sanctified bond that should not be broken except for
compelling reasons. Couples are instructed to pursue all possible remedies
whenever their marriages are in danger. Divorce is not to be resorted to except
when there is no other way out. In a nutshell, Islam recognizes divorce, yet it
discourages it by all means. Let us focus on the recognition side first. Islam
does recognize the right of both partners to end their matrimonial
relationship. Islam gives the husband the right for Talaq (divorce). Moreover,
Islam, unlike Judaism, grants the wife the right to dissolve the marriage
through what is known as Khula'. [36] If the husband dissolves the marriage by
divorcing his wife, he cannot retrieve any of the marriage gifts he has given
her. The Quran explicitly prohibits the divorcing husbands from taking back
their marriage gifts no matter how expensive or valuable these gifts might be:
"But if
you decide to take one wife in place of another, even if you had given the
latter a whole treasure for dower, take not the least bit of it back; Would you
take it by slander and a manifest wrong?" [Noble Quran 4:20]
In the case of
the wife choosing to end the marriage, she may return the marriage gifts to her
husband. Returning the marriage gifts in this case is a fair compensation for
the husband who is keen to keep his wife while she chooses to leave him. The
Quran has instructed Muslim men not to take back any of the gifts they have
given to their wives except in the case of the wife choosing to dissolve the
marriage:
"It is not
lawful for you (Men) to take back any of your gifts except when both parties
fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah. There is
no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom. These are the
limits ordained by Allah so do not transgress them" [Noble Quran 2:229]
Also, a woman
came to the Prophet Muhammad seeking the dissolution of her marriage, she told
the Prophet that she did not have any complaints against her husband's
character or manners. Her only problem was that she honestly did not like him
to the extent of not being able to live with him any longer. The Prophet asked
her: "Would you give him his garden (the marriage gift he had given her)
back?" she said: "Yes". The Prophet then instructed the man to
take back his garden and accept the dissolution of the marriage. [Bukhari]
In some cases,
A Muslim wife might be willing to keep her marriage but find herself obliged to
claim for a divorce because of some compelling reasons such as: Cruelty of the
husband, desertion without a reason, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal
responsibilities, etc. In these cases the Muslim court dissolves the marriage.
[37]
In short, Islam
has offered the Muslim woman some unequalled rights: she can end the marriage
through Khula' and she can sue for a divorce. A Muslim wife can never become
chained by a recalcitrant husband. It was these rights that enticed Jewish
women who lived in the early Islamic societies of the seventh century C.E. to
seek to obtain bills of divorce from their Jewish husbands in Muslim courts.
The Rabbis declared these bills null and void. In order to end this practice,
the Rabbis gave new rights and privileges to Jewish women in an attempt to
weaken the appeal of the Muslim courts. Jewish women living in Christian
countries were not offered any similar privileges since the Roman law of
divorce practiced there was no more attractive than the Jewish law. [38]
Let us now
focus our attention on how Islam discourages divorce. The Prophet of Islam told
the believers that:
"Among all
the permitted acts, divorce is the most hateful to God." [Abu Dawud]
A Muslim man
should not divorce his wife just because he dislikes her. The Quran instructs
Muslim men to be kind to their wives even in cases of lukewarm emotions or
feelings of dislike:
"Live with
them (your wives) on a footing of kindness and equity. If you dislike them it
may be that you dislike something in which Allah has placed a great deal of
good." [Noble Quran 4:19]
Prophet
Muhammad gave a similar instruction:
"A
believing man must not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one of her traits
he will be pleased with another." [Muslim]
The Prophet has
also emphasized that the best Muslims are those who are best to their wives:
"The
believers who show the most perfect faith are those who have the best character
and the best of you are those who are best to their wives." [Tirmidhi]
However, Islam
is a practical religion and it does recognize that there are circumstances in
which a marriage becomes on the verge of collapsing. In such cases, a mere
advice of kindness or self restraint is no viable solution. So, what to do in
order to save a marriage in these cases? The Quran offers some practical advice
for the spouse (husband or wife) whose partner (wife or husband) is the
wrongdoer. For the husband whose wife's ill-conduct is threatening the
marriage, the Quran gives four types of advice as detailed in the following
verses:
"As to
those women on whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, (1) Admonish
them, (2) refuse to share their beds, (3) beat them; but if they return to
obedience seek not against them means of annoyance: For Allah is Most High,
Great. (4) If you fear a break between them, appoint two arbiters, one from his
family and the other from hers; If they wish for peace, Allah will cause their
reconciliation." [Noble Quran 4:34-35]
The first three
are to be tried first. If they fail, then the help of the families concerned
should be sought. It has to be noted, in the light of the above verses, that
beating the rebellious wife is a temporary measure that is resorted to as third
in line in cases of extreme necessity in hopes that it might remedy the
wrongdoing of the wife. If it does, the husband is not allowed by any means to
continue any annoyance to the wife as explicitly mentioned in the verse. If it
does not, the husband is still not allowed to use this measure any longer and
the final avenue of the family-assisted reconciliation has to be explored.
Prophet
Muhammad has instructed Muslim husbands that they should not have recourse to
these measures except in extreme cases such as open lewdness committed by the
wife. Even in these cases the punishment should be slight and if the wife
desists, the husband is not permitted to irritate her:
"In case
they are guilty of open lewdness you may leave them alone in their beds and
inflict slight punishment. If they are obedient to you, do not seek against
them any means of annoyance." [Tirmidhi]
Furthermore,
the Prophet of Islam has condemned any unjustifiable beating. Some Muslim wives
complained to him that their husbands had beaten them. Hearing that, the
Prophet categorically stated that:
"Those who
do so (beat their wives) are not the best among you." [Abu Dawud]
It has to be
remembered at this point that the Prophet has also said:
"The best
of you is he who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my
family." [Tirmidhi]
The Prophet
advised one Muslim woman, whose name was Fatimah bint Qais, not to marry a man
because the man was known for beating women:
"I went to
the Prophet and said: Abul Jahm and Mu'awiah have proposed to marry me. The
Prophet (by way of advice) said: As to Mu'awiah he is very poor and Abul Jahm
is accustomed to beating women." [Muslim]
It has to be
noted that the Talmud sanctions wife beating as chastisement for the purpose of
discipline. [39] The husband is not restricted to the extreme cases such as
those of open lewdness. He is allowed to beat his wife even if she just refuses
to do her house work. Moreover, he is not limited only to the use of light
punishment. He is permitted to break his wife's stubbornness by the lash or by
starving her. [40]
For the wife
whose husband's ill-conduct is the cause for the marriages near collapse, the
Quran offers the following advice:
"If a wife
fears cruelty or desertion on her husband's part, there is no blame on them if
they arrange an amicable settlement between themselves; and such settlement is
best." [Noble Quran 4:128]
In this case,
the wife is advised to seek reconciliation with her husband (with or without
family assistance). It is notable that the Quran is not advising the wife to
resort to the two measures of abstention from sex and beating. The reason for
this disparity might be to protect the wife from a violent physical reaction by
her already misbehaving husband. Such a violent physical reaction will do both
the wife and the marriage more harm than good. Some Muslim scholars have
suggested that the court can apply these measures against the husband on the
wife's behalf. That is, the court first admonishes the rebellious husband, then
forbids him his wife's bed, and finally executes a symbolic beating. [41]
To sum up,
Islam offers Muslim married couples much viable advice to save their marriages
in cases of trouble and tension. If one of the partners is jeopardizing the
matrimonial relationship, the other partner is advised by the Quran to do
whatever possible and effective in order to save this sacred bond. If all the
measures fail, Islam allows the partners to separate peacefully and amicably.
MOTHERS
The Old
Testament in several places commands kind and considerate treatment of the
parents and condemns those who dishonor them. For example, "If anyone
curses his father or mother, he must be put to death" [Lev. 20:9] and
"A wise man brings joy to his father but a foolish man despises his
mother" [Proverbs 15:20] Although honoring the father alone is mentioned
in some places, e.g. "A wise man heeds his father's instruction"
[Proverbs 13:1], the mother alone is never mentioned. Moreover, there is no
special emphasis on treating the mother kindly as a sign of appreciation of her
great suffering in childbearing and suckling. Besides, mothers do not inherit at
all from their children while fathers do. [42]
It is difficult
to speak of the New Testament as a scripture that calls for honoring the
mother. To the contrary, one gets the impression that the New Testament
considers kind treatment of mothers as an impediment on the way to God.
According to the New Testament, one cannot become a good Christian worthy of
becoming a disciple of Christ unless he hates his mother. It is attributed to
Jesus to have said:
"If anyone
comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his
brothers and sisters--yes, even his own life--he can not be my disciple."
[Luke 14:26]
Furthermore,
the New Testament depicts a picture of Jesus as indifferent to, or even
disrespectful of, his own mother. For example, when she had come looking for
him while he was preaching to a crowd, he did not care to go out to see her:
"Then
Jesus' mother and brothers arrived. Standing outside, they sent someone to call
him. A crowd was sitting around him and they told him, 'Your mother and
brothers are outside looking for you.' 'Who are my mother and my brothers?' he
asked. Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said,' Here
are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God's will is my brother and sister
and mother.'" [Mark 3:31-35]
One might argue
that Jesus was trying to teach his audience an important lesson that religious
ties are no less important than family ties. However, he could have taught his
listeners the same lesson without showing such absolute indifference to his
mother. The same disrespectful attitude is depicted when he refused to endorse
a statement made by a member of his audience blessing his mother's role in
giving birth to him and nursing him:
"As Jesus
was saying these things, a woman in the crowd called out, 'Blessed is the
mother who gave you birth and nursed you.' He replied, 'Blessed rather are
those who hear the word of God and obey it.'" [Luke 11:27-28]
If a mother
with the stature of the virgin Mary had been treated with such discourtesy, as
depicted in the New Testament, by a son of the stature of Jesus Christ, then
how should an average Christian mother be treated by her average Christian
sons?
In Islam, the
honor, respect, and esteem attached to motherhood is unparalleled. The Quran
places the importance of kindness to parents as second only to worshipping God
Almighty:
"Your Lord
has decreed that you worship none but Him, And that you be kind to parents.
Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, Say not to them a word
of contempt, nor repel them, But address them in terms of honor. And out of
kindness, Lower to them the wing of humility, and say: 'My Lord! Bestow on them
Your Mercy as they Cherished me in childhood'" [17:23-24]
The Quran in
several other places puts special emphasis on the mother's great role in giving
birth and nursing:
"And We
have enjoined on man to be good to his parents: In travail upon travail did his
mother bear him and in two years was his weaning. Show gratitude to Me and to
your parents" [Noble Quran 31:14]
The very
special place of mothers in Islam has been eloquently described by Prophet
Muhammad:
"A man
asked the Prophet: 'Whom should I honor most?' The Prophet replied: 'Your
mother'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your
mother'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your
mother!'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your
father'" [Bukhari and Muslim]
Among the few
precepts of Islam which Muslims still faithfully observe to the present day is
the considerate treatment of mothers. The honor that Muslim mothers receive
from their sons and daughters is exemplary. The intensely warm relations
between Muslim mothers and their children and the deep respect with which
Muslim men approach their mothers usually amaze Westerners. [43]
FEMALE
INHERITANCE?
One of the most
important differences between the Quran and the Bible is their attitude towards
female inheritance of the property of a deceased relative. The Biblical
attitude has been succinctly described by Rabbi Epstein: "The continuous
and unbroken tradition since the Biblical days gives the female members of the
household, wife and daughters, no right of succession to the family estate. In
the more primitive scheme of succession, the female members of the family were
considered part of the estate and as remote from the legal personality of an
heir as the slave. Whereas by Mosaic enactment the daughters were admitted to
succession in the event of no male issue remained, the wife was not recognized
as heir even in such conditions." [44] Why were the female members of the
family considered part of the family estate? Rabbi Epstein has the answer:
"They are owned --before marriage, by the father; after marriage, by the
husband." [4]
The Biblical
rules of inheritance are outlined in Numbers 27:1-11. A wife is given no share
in her husband's estate, while he is her first heir, even before her sons. A
daughter can inherit only if no male heirs exist. A mother is not an heir at
all while the father is. Widows and daughters, in case male children remained,
were at the mercy of the male heirs for provision. That is why widows and
orphan girls were among the most destitute members of the Jewish society.
Christianity
has followed suit for long time. Both the ecclesiastical and civil laws of
Christendom barred daughters from sharing with their brothers in the father's
patrimony. Besides, wives were deprived of any inheritance rights. These
iniquitous laws survived till late in the last century. [46]
Among the pagan
Arabs before Islam, inheritance rights were confined exclusively to the male
relatives. The Quran abolished all these unjust customs and gave all the female
relatives inheritance shares:
"From what
is left by parents and those nearest related there is a share for men and a
share for women, whether the property be small or large --a determinate
share" [Noble Quran 4:7]
Muslim mothers,
wives, daughters, and sisters had received inheritance rights thirteen hundred
years before Europe recognized that these rights even existed. The division of
inheritance is a vast subject with an enormous amount of details.
[4:7,11,12,176]
The general
rule is that the female share is half the male's except the cases in which the
mother receives equal share to that of the father. This general rule if taken
in isolation from other legislations concerning men and women may seem unfair.
In order to understand the rationale behind this rule, one must take into
account the fact that the financial obligations of men in Islam far exceed
those of women. A bridegroom must provide his bride with a marriage gift. This
gift becomes her exclusive property and remains so even if she is later
divorced. The bride is under no obligation to present any gifts to her groom. Moreover,
the Muslim husband is charged with the maintenance of his wife and children.
The wife, on the other hand, is not obliged to help him in this regard. Her
property and earnings are for her use alone except what she may voluntarily
offer her husband. Besides, one has to realize that Islam vehemently advocates
family life. It strongly encourages youth to get married, discourages divorce,
and does not regard celibacy as a virtue. Therefore, in a truly Islamic
society, family life is the norm and single life is the rare exception. That
is, almost all marriage-aged women and men are married in an Islamic society.
In light of these facts, one would appreciate that Muslim men, in general, have
greater financial burdens than Muslim women and thus inheritance rules are
meant to offset this imbalance so that the society lives free of all gender or
class wars. After a simple comparison between the financial rights and duties
of Muslim women, one British Muslim woman has concluded that Islam has treated
women not only fairly but generously. [47]
PLIGHT OF
WIDOWS
Because of the
fact that the Old Testament recognized no inheritance rights to them, widows
were among the most vulnerable of the Jewish population. The male relatives who
inherited all of a woman's deceased husband's estate were to provide for her
from that estate. However, widows had no way to ensure this provision was
carried out, and lived on the mercy of others. Therefore, widows were among the
lowest classes in ancient Israel and widowhood was considered a symbol of great
degradation. [Isaiah 54:4]
But the plight
of a widow in the Biblical tradition extended even beyond her exclusion from
her husband's property. According to Genesis 38, a childless widow must marry
her husband's brother, even if he is already married, so that he can produce
offspring for his dead brother, thus ensuring his brother's name will not die
out.
"Then
Judah said to Onan, 'Lie with your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her
as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother'" [Genesis 38:8]
The widow's
consent to this marriage is not required. The widow is treated as part of her
deceased husband's property whose main function is to ensure her husband's
posterity. This Biblical law is still practiced in today's Israel. [48] A
childless widow in Israel is bequeathed to her husband's brother. If the
brother is too young to marry, she has to wait until he comes of age. Should
the deceased husband's brother refuse to marry her, she is set free and can
then marry any man of her choice. It is not an uncommon phenomenon in Israel
that widows are subjected to blackmail by their brothers-in-law in order to
gain their freedom.
The pagan Arabs
before Islam had similar practices. A widow was considered a part of her
husband's property to be inherited by his male heirs and she was, usually,
given in marriage to the deceased man's eldest son from another wife. The Quran
scathingly attacked and abolished this degrading custom:
"And marry
not women whom your fathers married--Except what is past-- it was shameful,
odious, and abominable custom indeed." [Noble Quran 4:22]
Widows and
divorced women were so looked down upon in the Biblical tradition that the high
priest could not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a prostitute:
"The woman
he (the high priest) marries must be a virgin. He must not marry a widow, a
divorced woman, or a woman defiled by prostitution, but only a virgin from his
own people, so he will not defile his offspring among his people" [Lev.
21:13-15]
In Israel
today, a descendant of the Cohen caste (the high priests of the days of the
Temple) cannot marry a divorcee, a widow, or a prostitute. [49] In the Jewish
legislation, a woman who has been widowed three times with all the three
husbands dying of natural causes is considered 'fatal' and forbidden to marry
again. [50] The Quran, on the other hand, recognizes neither castes nor fatal
persons. Widows and divorcees have the freedom to marry whomever they choose.
There is no stigma attached to divorce or widowhood in the Quran:
"When you
divorce women and they fulfill their terms [three menstruation periods] either
take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms; But do
not take them back to injure them or to take undue advantage, If anyone does
that, he wrongs his own soul. Do not treat Allah's signs as a jest."
[Noble Quran 2:231]
"If any of
you die and leave widows behind, they shall wait four months and ten days. When
they have fulfilled their term, there is no blame on you if they dispose of
themselves in a just manner." [Noble Quran 2:234]
"Those of
you who die and leave widows should bequeath for their widows a year's
maintenance and residence. But if they [the widows] leave (the residence) there
is no blame on you for what they justly do with themselves." [Noble Quran
2:240]
POLYGAMY
Let us now
tackle the important question of polygamy. Polygamy is a very ancient practice
found in many human societies. The Bible did not condemn polygamy. To the
contrary, the Old Testament and Rabbinic writings frequently attest to the
legality of polygamy. King Solomon is said to have had 700 wives and 300
concubines [1 Kings 11:3] Also, king David is said to have had many wives and
concubines. [2 Samuel 5:13] The Old Testament does have some injunctions on how
to distribute the property of a man among his sons from different wives [Deut.
22:7] The only restriction on polygamy is a ban on taking a wife's sister as a
rival wife. [Lev. 18:18] The Talmud advises a maximum of four wives. [51]
European Jews continued to practice polygamy until the sixteenth century.
Oriental Jews regularly practiced polygamy until they arrived in Israel where
it is forbidden under civil law. However, under religious law which overrides
civil law in such cases, it is permissible. [52]
What about the
New Testament? According to Father Eugene Hillman in his insightful book,
Polygamy reconsidered, "Nowhere in the New Testament is there any explicit
commandment that marriage should be monogamous or any explicit commandment forbidding
polygamy. [53] Moreover, Jesus has not spoken against polygamy though it was
practiced by the Jews of his society. Father Hillman stresses the fact that the
Church in Rome banned polygamy in order to conform to the Greco-Roman culture
(which prescribed only one legal wife while tolerating concubinage and
prostitution). He cited St. Augustine, "Now indeed in our time, and in
keeping with Roman custom, it is no longer allowed to take another wife."
[54] African churches and African Christians often remind their European
brothers that the Church's ban on polygamy is a cultural tradition and not an
authentic Christian injunction.
The Quran, too,
allowed polygamy, but not without restrictions:
"If you
fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of
your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able
to deal justly with them, then only one" [Noble Quran 4:3]
The Quran,
contrary to the Bible, limited the maximum number of wives to four under the strict
condition of treating the wives equally and justly. It should not be understood
that the Quran is exhorting the believers to practice polygamy, or that
polygamy is considered as an ideal. In other words, the Quran has
"tolerated" or "allowed" polygamy, and no more, but why?
Why is polygamy permissible? The answer is simple: there are places and times
in which there are compelling social and moral reasons for polygamy. As the
above Quranic verse indicates, the issue of polygamy in Islam cannot be understood
apart from community obligations towards orphans and widows. Islam as a
universal religion suitable for all places and all times could not ignore these
compelling obligations.
In most human
societies, females outnumber males. In the U.S. there are, at least, eight
million more women than men. In a country like Guinea there are 122 females for
every 100 males. In Tanzania, there are 95.1 males per 100 females. [55] What
should a society do towards such unbalanced sex ratios? There are various
solutions, some might suggest celibacy, others would prefer female infanticide
(which does happen in some societies in the world today!). Others may think the
only outlet is that the society should tolerate all manners of sexual
permissiveness: prostitution, sex out of wedlock, homosexuality, etc. For other
societies, like most African societies today, the most honorable outlet is to
allow polygamous marriage as a culturally accepted and socially respected
institution. The point that is often misunderstood in the West is that women in
other cultures do not necessarily look at polygamy as a sign of women's
degradation. For example, many young African brides, wether Christians or
Muslims or otherwise, would prefer to marry a married man who has already
proved himself to be a responsible husband. Many African wives urge their
husbands to get a second wife so that they do not feel lonely. [56] A survey of
over six thousand women, ranging in age from 15 to 59, conducted in the second
largest city in Nigeria showed that 60 percent of these women would be pleased
if their husbands took another wife. Only 23 percent expressed anger at the
idea of sharing with another wife. Seventy-six percent of the women in a survey
conducted in Kenya viewed polygamy positively. In a survey undertaken in rural
Kenya, 25 out of 27 women considered polygamy to be better than monogamy. These
women felt polygamy can be a happy and beneficial experience if the co-wives
cooperate with each other. [57] Polygamy in most African societies is such a respectable
institution that some Protestant churches are becoming more tolerant of it. A
bishop of the Anglican Church in Kenya declared that, "Although monogamy
may be ideal for the expression of love between husband and wife, the church
should consider that in certain cultures polygamy is socially acceptable and
that the belief that polygamy is contrary to Christianity is no longer
tenable." [58] After a careful study of African polygamy, Reverend David
Gitari of the Anglican Church has concluded that polygamy, as ideally
practiced, is more Christian than divorce and remarriage as far as the
abandoned wives and children are concerned. [59] I personally know of some
highly educated African wives who, despite having lived in the West for many
years, do not have any objections against polygamy. One of them, who lies in
the U.S., solemnly exhorts her husband to get a second wife to help her in
raising the kids.
The problem of
the unbalanced sex ratios becomes truly problematic at times of war. Native
American Indian tribes used to suffer highly unbalanced sex ratios after
wartime losses. Women in these tribes, who in fact enjoyed a fairly high
status, accepted polygamy as the best protection against indulgence in indecent
activities. European settlers, without offering any other alternative,
condemned this Indian polygamy as 'un-civilized'. [60] After the second world
war, there were 7,300,000 more women than men in Germany (3.3 million of them
were widows). There were 100 men aged 20 to 30 for every 167 women in that age
group. [61] Many of these women needed a man not only as a companion but also
as a provider for the household in a time of unprecedented misery and hardship.
The soldiers of the victorious Allied Armies exploited these women's
vulnerability. Many young girls and widows had liaisons with members of the
occupying forces. Many American and British soldiers paid for their pleasures
in cigarettes, chocolate, and bread. Children were overjoyed at the gifts these
strangers brought. A 10 year old boy on hearing of such gifts from other
children wished from all his heart for an 'Englishman' for his mother so that
she need not go hungry any longer. [62] We have to ask our own conscience at
this point: What is more dignifying to a woman? An accepted and respected
second wife as in the native Indians' approach, or a virtual prostitute as in
the 'civilized' Allies approach? In other words, what is more dignifying to a
woman, the Quranic prescription or the theology based on the culture of the
Roman Empire?
It is
interesting to note that in an international youth conference held in Munich in
1948 the problem of the highly unbalanced sex ratio in Germany was discussed.
When it became clear that no solution could be agreed upon, some participants
suggested polygamy. The initial reaction of the gathering was a mixture of
shock and disgust. However, after a careful study of the proposal, the
participants agreed that it was the only possible solution. Consequently,
polygamy was included among the conference final recommendations. [63]
The world today
possesses more weapons of mass destruction than ever before and the European
churches might, sooner or later, be obliged to accept polygamy as the only way
out. Father Hillman has thoughtfully recognized this fact, "It is quite
conceivable that these genocidal techniques (nuclear, biological, chemical..)
could produce so drastic an imbalance among the sexes that plural marriage
would become a necessary means of survival....Then contrary to previous custom
and law, an overriding natural and moral inclination might arise in favour of
polygamy. In such a situation, theologians and church leaders would quickly
produce weighty reasons and biblical texts to justify a new conception of
marriage." [64]
To the present
day, polygamy continues to be a viable solution to some of the social ills of
modern societies. The communal obligations that the Quran mentions in
association with the permission of polygamy are more visible at present in some
Western societies than in Africa. For example, In the United States today,
there is a severe gender crisis in the black community. One out of every twenty
young black males may die before reaching the age of 21. For those between 20
and 35 years of age, homicide is the leading cause of death. [65] Besides, many
young black males are unemployed, in jail, or on dope. [66] As a result, one in
four black women, at age 40, has never married, as compared with one in ten
white women. [67] Moreover, many young black females become single mothers
before the age of 20 and find themselves in need of providers. The end result
of these tragic circumstances is that an increasing number of black women are
engaged in what is called 'man-sharing'. [68] That is, many of these hapless single
black women are involved in affairs with married men. The wives are often
unaware of the fact that other women are 'sharing' their husbands with them.
Some observers of the crisis of man-sharing in the African American community
strongly recommend consensual polygamy as a temporary answer to the shortage of
black males until more comprehensive reforms in the American society at large
are undertaken. [69] By consensual polygamy they mean a polygamy that is
sanctioned by the community and to which all the parties involved have agreed,
as opposed to the usually secret man-sharing which is detrimental both to the
wife and to the community in general. The problem of man-sharing in the African
American community was the topic of a panel discussion held at Temple
University in Philadelphia on January 27, 1993. [70] Some of the speakers
recommended polygamy as one potential remedy for the crisis. They also
suggested that polygamy should not be banned by law, particularly in a society
that tolerates prostitution and mistresses. The comment of one woman from the
audience that African Americans needed to learn from Africa where polygamy was
responsibly practiced elicited enthusiastic applause.
Philip
Kilbride, an American anthropologist of Roman Catholic heritage, in his
provocative book, Plural marriage for our time, proposes polygamy as a solution
to some of the ills of the American society at large. He argues that plural
marriage may serve as a potential alternative for divorce in many cases in
order to obviate the damaging impact of divorce on many children. He maintains
that many divorces are caused by the rampant extramarital affairs in the
American society. According to Kilbride, ending an extramarital affair in a
polygamous marriage, rather than in a divorce, is better for the children,
"Children would be better served if family augmentation rather than only
separation and dissolution were seen as options." Moreover, he suggests
that other groups will also benefit from plural marriage such as: elderly women
who face a chronic shortage of men and the African Americans who are involved
in man-sharing. [71]
In 1987, a poll
conducted by the student newspaper at the University of California at Berkeley
asked the students whether they agreed that men should be allowed by law to
have more than one wife in response to a perceived shortage of male marriage
candidates in California. Almost all of the students polled approved of the
idea. One female student even stated that a polygamous marriage would fulfill
her emotional and physical needs while giving her greater freedom than a
monogamous union. [72] In fact, this same argument is also used by the few
remaining fundamentalist Mormon women who still practice polygamy in the U.S.
They believe that polygamy is an ideal way for a woman to have both a career
and children since the wives help each other care for the children. [73]
It has to be
added that polygamy in Islam is a matter of mutual consent. No one can force a
woman to marry a married man. Besides, the wife has the right to stipulate that
her husband must not marry any other woman as a second wife. [74] The Bible, on
the other hand, sometimes resorts to forcible polygamy. A childless widow must
marry her husband's brother, even if he is already married, regardless of her
consent. [Genesis 38:8-10]
It should be
noted that in many Muslim societies today the practice of polygamy is rare
since the gap between the numbers of both sexes is not huge. One can, safely,
say that the rate of polygamous marriages in the Muslim world is much less than
the rate of extramarital affairs in the West. In other words, men in the Muslim
world today are far more strictly monogamous than men in the Western world.
Billy Graham,
the eminent Christian evangelist has recognized this fact: "Christianity
cannot compromise on the question of polygamy. If present-day Christianity
cannot do so, it is to its own detriment. Islam has permitted polygamy as a
solution to social ills and has allowed a certain degree of latitude to human
nature but only within the strictly defined framework of the law. Christian
countries make a great show of monogamy, but actually they practice polygamy.
No one is unaware of the part mistresses play in Western society. In this
respect Islam is a fundamentally honest religion, and permits a Muslim to marry
a second wife if he must, but strictly forbids all clandestine amatory
associations in order to safeguard the moral probity of the community."
[75]
It is of
interest to note that many, non-Muslim as well as Muslim, countries in the
world today have outlawed polygamy. Taking a second wife, even with the free
consent of the first wife, is a violation of the law. On the other hand,
cheating on the wife, without her knowledge or consent, is perfectly legitimate
as far as the law is concerned! What is the legal wisdom behind such a
contradiction? Is the law designed to reward deception and punish honesty? It
is one of the unfathomable paradoxes of our modern 'civilized' world.
THE VEIL
Finally, let us
shed some light on what is considered in the West as the greatest symbol of
women's oppression and servitude, the veil or the head cover. Is it true that
there is no such thing as the veil in the Judaeo-Christian tradition? Let us
set the record straight. According to Rabbi Dr. Menachem M. Brayer (Professor
of Biblical Literature at Yeshiva University) in his book, The Jewish woman in
Rabbinic literature, it was the custom of Jewish women to go out in public with
a head covering which, sometimes, even covered the whole face leaving one eye
free. [76] He quotes some famous ancient Rabbis saying," It is not like
the daughters of Israel to walk out with heads uncovered" and "Cursed
be the man who lets the hair of his wife be seen....a woman who exposes her
hair for self-adornment brings poverty." Rabbinic law forbids the
recitation of blessings or prayers in the presence of a bareheaded married
woman since uncovering the woman's hair is considered "nudity". [77]
Dr. Brayer also mentions that "During the Tannaitic period the Jewish woman's
failure to cover her head was considered an affront to her modesty. When her
head was uncovered she might be fined four hundred zuzim for this
offense." Dr. Brayer also explains that veil of the Jewish woman was not
always considered a sign of modesty. Sometimes, the veil symbolized a state of
distinction and luxury rather than modesty. The veil personified the dignity
and superiority of noble women. It also represented a woman's inaccessibility
as a sanctified possession of her husband. [78]
The veil signified
a woman's self-respect and social status. Women of lower classes would often
wear the veil to give the impression of a higher standing. The fact that the
veil was the sign of nobility was the reason why prostitutes were not permitted
to cover their hair in the old Jewish society. However, prostitutes often wore
a special headscarf in order to look respectable. [79] Jewish women in Europe
continued to wear veils until the nineteenth century when their lives became
more intermingled with the surrounding secular culture. The external pressures
of the European life in the nineteenth century forced many of them to go out
bare-headed. Some Jewish women found it more convenient to replace their
traditional veil with a wig as another form of hair covering. Today, most pious
Jewish women do not cover their hair except in the synagogue. [80] Some of
them, such as the Hasidic sects, still use the wig. [81]
What about the
Christian tradition? It is well known that Catholic Nuns have been covering
their heads for hundreds of years, but that is not all. St. Paul in the New
Testament made some very interesting statements about the veil:
"Now I
want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the
woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. Every man who prays or prophesies
with his head covered dishonors his head. And every woman who prays or
prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head - it is just as though
her head were shaved. If a woman does not cover her head, she should have her
hair cut off; and if it is a disgrace for a woman to have her hair cut off or
shaved off, she should cover her head. A man ought not to cover his head, since
he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. For man
did not come from woman, but woman from man; neither was man created for woman,
but woman for man. For this reason, and because of the angels, the woman ought
to have a sign of authority on her head." [I Corinthians 11:3-10]
St. Paul's
rationale for veiling women is that the veil represents a sign of the authority
of the man, who is the image and glory of God, over the woman who was created
from and for man. St. Tertullian in his famous treatise 'On The Veiling Of
Virgins' wrote, "Young women, you wear your veils out on the streets, so
you should wear them in the church, you wear them when you are among strangers,
then wear them among your brothers..." Among the Canon laws of the
Catholic church today, there is a law that requires women to cover their heads
in church. [82] Some Christian denominations, such as the Amish and the
Mennonites for example, keep their women veiled to the present day. The reason
for the veil, as offered by their Church leaders, is that "The head
covering is a symbol of woman's subjection to the man and to God", which
is the same logic introduced by St. Paul in the New Testament. [83]
From all the
above evidence, it is obvious that Islam did not invent the head cover.
However, Islam did endorse it. The Quran urges the believing men and women to
lower their gaze and guard their modesty and then urges the believing women to
extend their head covers to cover the neck and the bosom:
"Say to
the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their
modesty......And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze
and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and
ornaments except what ordinarily appear thereof; that they should draw their
veils over their bosoms...." [Noble Quran 24:30,31]
The Quran is
quite clear that the veil is essential for modesty, but why is modesty
important? The Quran is still clear:
"O
Prophet, tell your wives and daughters and the believing women that they should
cast their outer garments over their bodies (when abroad) so that they should
be known and not molested" [Noble Quran 33:59]
This is the
whole point, modesty is prescribed to protect women from molestation or simply,
modesty is protection. Thus, the only purpose of the veil in Islam is
protection. The Islamic veil, unlike the veil of the Christian tradition, is
not a sign of man's authority over woman nor is it a sign of woman's subjection
to man. The Islamic veil, unlike the veil in the Jewish tradition, is not a
sign of luxury and distinction of some noble married women. The Islamic veil is
only a sign of modesty with the purpose of protecting women, all women. The
Islamic philosophy is that it is always better to be safe than sorry. In fact,
the Quran is so concerned with protecting women's bodies and women's reputation
that a man who dares to falsely accuse a woman of unchastity will be severely
punished:
"And those
who launch a charge against chaste women, and produce not four witnesses (to
support their allegations)- Flog them with eighty stripes; and reject their
evidence ever after: for such men are wicked transgressors" [Noble Quran
24:4]
Compare this
strict Quranic attitude with the extremely lax punishment for rape in the
Bible:
"If a man
happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and
they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He
must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long
as he lives" [Deut. 22:28-30]
One must ask a
simple question here, who is really punished? The man who only paid a fine for
rape, or the girl who is forced to marry the man who raped her and live with
him until he dies? Another question that also should be asked is this: which is
more protective of women, the Quranic strict attitude or the Biblical lax
attitude?
Some people,
especially in the West, would tend to ridicule the whole argument of modesty
for protection. Their argument is that the best protection is the spread of
education, civilized behavior, and self restraint. We would say: fine but not
enough. If 'civilization' is enough protection, then why is it that women in
North America dare not walk alone in a dark street - or even across an empty
parking lot? If Education is the solution, then why is it that a respected
university like Queen's has a 'walk home service' mainly for female students on
campus? If self restraint is the answer, then why are cases of sexual
harassment in the workplace reported on the news media every day? A sample of
those accused of sexual harassment, in the last few years, includes: Navy
officers, Managers, university professors, Senators, Supreme Court Justices,
and the President of the United States! I could not believe my eyes when I read
the following statistics, written in a pamphlet issued by the Dean of Women's
office at Queen's university:
In Canada, a
woman is sexually assaulted every 6 minutes,
1 in 3 women in
Canada will be sexually assaulted at some time in their lives,
1 in 4 women
are at the risk of rape or attempted rape in her lifetime,
1 in 8 women
will be sexually assaulted while attending college or university, and
A study found
60% of Canadian university-aged males said they would commit sexual assault if
they were certain they wouldn't get caught.
Something is
fundamentally wrong in the society we live in. A radical change in the
society's life style and culture is absolutely necessary. A culture of modesty
is badly needed, modesty in dress, in speech, and in manners of both men and
women. Otherwise, the grim statistics will grow even worse day after day and,
unfortunately, women alone will be paying the price. Actually, we all suffer
but as K. Gibran has said, "...for the person who receives the blows is
not like the one who counts them." [84] Therefore, a society like France
which expels young women from schools because of their modest dress is, in the
end, simply harming itself.
It is one of
the great ironies of our world today that the very same headscarf revered as a
sign of 'holiness' when worn for the purpose of showing the authority of man by
Catholic Nuns, is reviled as a sign of 'oppression' when worn for the purpose
of protection by Muslim women.
EPILOGUE
The one
question all the non-Muslims, who had read an earlier version of this study,
had in common was: do Muslim women in the Muslim world today receive this noble
treatment described here? The answer, unfortunately, is: No. Since this
question is inevitable in any discussion concerning the status of women in
Islam, we have to elaborate on the answer in order to provide the reader with
the complete picture.
It has to be
made clear first that the vast differences among Muslim societies make most
generalizations too simplistic. There is a wide spectrum of attitudes towards
women in the Muslim world today. These attitudes differ from one society to
another and within each individual society. Nevertheless, certain general trends
are discernible. Almost all Muslim societies have, to one degree or another,
deviated from the ideals of Islam with respect to the status of women. These
deviations have, for the most part, been in one of two opposite directions. The
first direction is more conservative, restrictive, and traditions-oriented,
while the second is more liberal and Western-oriented.
The societies
that have digressed in the first direction treat women according to the customs
and traditions inherited from their forebears. These traditions usually deprive
women of many rights granted to them by Islam. Besides, women are treated
according to standards far different from those applied to men. This
discrimination pervades the life of any female: she is received with less joy at
birth than a boy; she is less likely to go to school; she might be deprived any
share of her family's inheritance; she is under continuous surveillance in
order not to behave immodestly while her brother's immodest acts are tolerated;
she might even be killed for committing what her male family members usually
boast of doing; she has very little say in family affairs or community
interests; she might not have full control over her property and her marriage
gifts; and finally as a mother she herself would prefer to produce boys so that
she can attain a higher status in her community.
On the other
hand, there are Muslim societies (or certain classes within some societies)
that have been swept over by the Western culture and way of life. These
societies often imitate unthinkingly whatever they receive from the West and
usually end up adopting the worst fruits of Western civilization. In these
societies, a typical "modern" woman's top priority in life is to
enhance her physical beauty. Therefore, she is often obsessed with her body's
shape, size, and weight. She tends to care more about her body than her mind
and more about her charms than her intellect. Her ability to charm, attract,
and excite is more valued in the society than her educational achievements, intellectual
pursuits, and social work. One is not expected to find a copy of the Quran in
her purse since it is full of cosmetics that accompany her wherever she goes.
Her spirituality has no room in a society preoccupied with her attractiveness.
Therefore, she would spend her life striving more to realize her femininity
than to fulfill her humanity.
Why did Muslim
societies deviate from the ideals of Islam? There is no easy answer. A
penetrating explanation of the reasons why Muslims have not adhered to the
Quranic guidance with respect to women would be beyond the scope of this study.
It has to be made clear, however, that Muslim societies have deviated from the
Islamic precepts concerning so many aspects of their lives for so long. There
is a wide gap between what Muslims are supposed to believe in and what they
actually practice. This gap is not a recent phenomenon. It has been there for
centuries and has been widening day after day. This ever widening gap has had
disastrous consequences on the Muslim world manifested in almost all aspects of
life: political tyranny and fragmentation, economic backwardness, social
injustice, scientific bankruptcy, intellectual stagnation, etc. The non-Islamic
status of women in the Muslim world today is merely a symptom of a deeper
malady. Any reform in the current status of Muslim women is not expected to be
fruitful if not accompanied with more comprehensive reforms of the Muslim
societies' whole way of life. The Muslim world is in need for a renaissance
that will bring it closer to the ideals of Islam and not further from them. To
sum up, the notion that the poor status of Muslim women today is because of
Islam is an utter misconception. The problems of Muslims in general are not due
to too much attachment to Islam, they are the culmination of a long and deep
detachment from it.
It has, also,
to be re-emphasized that the purpose behind this comparative study is not, by
any means, to defame Judaism or Christianity. The position of women in the
Judaeo-Christian tradition might seem frightening by our late twentieth century
standards. Nevertheless, it has to be viewed within the proper historical
context. In other words, any objective assessment of the position of women in
the Judaeo-Christian tradition has to take into account the historical
circumstances in which this tradition developed. There can be no doubt that the
views of the Rabbis and the Church Fathers regarding women were influenced by
the prevalent attitudes towards women in their societies. The Bible itself was
written by different authors at different times. These authors could not have
been impervious to the values and the way of life of the people around them.
For example, the adultery laws of the Old Testament are so biased against women
that they defy rational explanation by our mentality. However, if we consider
the fact that the early Jewish tribes were obsessed with their genetic
homogeneity and extremely eager to define themselves apart from the surrounding
tribes and that only sexual misconduct by the married females of the tribes
could threaten these cherished aspirations, we should then be able to
understand, but not necessarily sympathize with, the reasons for this bias.
Also, the diatribes of the Church Fathers against women should not be detached
from the context of the misogynist Greco-Roman culture in which they lived. It
would be unfair to evaluate the Judaeo-Christian legacy without giving any
consideration to the relevant historical context.
In fact, a
proper understanding of the Judaeo-Christian historical context is also crucial
for understanding the significance of the contributions of Islam to world
history and human civilization. The Judaeo-Christian tradition had been
influenced and shaped by the environments, conditions, and cultures in which it
had existed. By the seventh century C.E., this influence had distorted the
original divine message revealed to Moses and Jesus beyond recognition. The
poor status of women in the Judaeo-Christian world by the seventh century is
just one case in point. Therefore, there was a great need for a new divine
message that would guide humanity back to the straight path. The Quran
described the mission of the new Messenger as a release for Jews and Christians
from the heavy burdens that had been upon them:
"Those who
follow the Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, whom they find mentioned in their
own Scriptures--In the Law and the Gospel-- For he commands them what is just
and forbids them what is evil; he allows them as lawful what is good and
prohibits them from what is bad; He releases them from their heavy burdens and
from the yokes that are upon them" [Noble Quran 7:157]
Therefore,
Islam should not be viewed as a rival tradition to Judaism or Christianity. It
has to be regarded as the consummation, completion, and perfection of the
divine messages that had been revealed before it.
At the end of
this study, I would like to offer the following advice to the global Muslim
community. So many Muslim women have been denied their basic Islamic rights for
so long. The mistakes of the past have to be corrected. To do that is not a
favor, it is a duty incumbent upon all Muslims. The worldwide Muslim community
have to issue a charter of Muslim women's rights based on the instructions of
the Quran and the teachings of the Prophet of Islam. This charter must give
Muslim women all the rights endowed to them by their Creator. Then, all the
necessary means have to be developed in order to ensure the proper
implementation of the charter. This charter is long overdue, but it is better
late than never. If Muslims worldwide will not guarantee the full Islamic
rights of their mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters, who else will?
Furthermore, we
must have the courage to confront our past and reject outright the traditions
and customs of our forefathers whenever they contravene the precepts of Islam.
Did the Quran not severely criticize the pagan Arabs for blindly following the
traditions of their ancestors? On the other hand, we have to develop a critical
attitude towards whatever we receive from the West or from any other culture.
Interaction with and learning from other cultures is an invaluable experience.
The Quran has succinctly considered this interaction as one of the purposes of
creation:
"O mankind
We created you from a single pair of a male and a female, and made you into
nations and tribes, that you may know each other" [Noble Quran 49:13]
It goes without
saying, however, that blind imitation of others is a sure sign of an utter lack
of self-esteem.
It is to the
non-Muslim reader, Jewish, Christian, or otherwise, that these final words are
dedicated. It is bewildering why the religion that had revolutionized the
status of women is being singled out and denigrated as so repressive of women.
This perception about Islam is one of the most widespread myths in our world
today. This myth is being perpetuated by a ceaseless barrage of sensational
books, articles, media images, and Hollywood movies. The inevitable outcome of
these incessant misleading images has been total misunderstanding and fear of
anything related to Islam. This negative portrayal of Islam in the world media
has to end if we are to live in a world free from all traces of discrimination,
prejudice, and misunderstanding. Non-Muslims ought to realize the existence of
a wide gap between Muslims' beliefs and practices and the simple fact that the
actions of Muslims do not necessarily represent Islam. To label the status of
women in the Muslim world today as "Islamic" is as far from the truth
as labeling the position of women in the West today as
"Judaeo-Christian". With this understanding in mind, Muslims and
non-Muslims should start a process of communication and dialogue in order to
remove all misconceptions, suspicions, and fears. A peaceful future for the
human family necessitates such a dialogue.
Islam should be
viewed as a religion that had immensely improved the status of women and had
granted them many rights that the modern world has recognized only this
century. Islam still has so much to offer today's woman: dignity, respect, and
protection in all aspects and all stages of her life from birth until death in
addition to the recognition, the balance, and means for the fulfillment of all
her spiritual, intellectual, physical, and emotional needs. No wonder most of
those who choose to become Muslims in a country like Britain are women. In the
U.S. women converts to Islam outnumber male converts 4 to 1.[85] Islam has so
much to offer our world which is in great need of moral guidance and leadership.
Ambassador Herman Eilts, in a testimony in front of the committee on Foreign
Affairs of the House of Representatives of the United States Congress on June
24th, 1985, said, "The Muslim community of the globe today is in the
neighborhood of one billion. That is an impressive figure. But what to me is
equally impressive is that Islam today is the fastest growing monotheistic
religion. This is something we have to take into account. Something is right
about Islam. It is attracting a good many people." Yes, something is right
about Islam and it is time to find that out. I hope this study is a step on
this direction.
FOOTNOTES
1. The Globe
and Mail, Oct. 4,1994.
2. Leonard J.
Swidler, Women in Judaism: the Status of Women in Formative Judaism (Metuchen,
N.J: Scarecrow Press, 1976) p. 115.
3. Thena
Kendath, "Memories of an Orthodox youth" in Susannah Heschel, ed. On
being a Jewish Feminist (New York: Schocken Books, 1983), pp. 96-97.
4. Swidler, op.
cit., pp. 80-81.
5. Rosemary R.
Ruether, "Christianity", in Arvind Sharma, ed., Women in World
Religions (Albany: State University of New York Press, 1987) p. 209.
6. For all the
sayings of the prominent Saints, see Karen Armstrong, The Gospel According to
Woman (London: Elm Tree Books, 1986) pp. 52-62. See also Nancy van Vuuren, The
Subversion of Women as Practiced by Churches, Witch-Hunters, and Other Sexists
(Philadelphia: Westminister Press) pp. 28-30.
7. Swidler, op.
cit., p. 140.
8. Denise L.
Carmody, "Judaism", in Arvind Sharma, ed., op. cit., p. 197.
9. Swidler, op.
cit., p. 137.
10. Ibid., p.
138.
11. Sally
Priesand, Judaism and the New Woman (New York: Behrman House, Inc., 1975) p.
24.
12. Swidler,
op. cit., p. 115.
13. Lesley
Hazleton, Israeli Women The Reality Behind the Myths (New York: Simon and
Schuster, 1977) p. 41.
14. Gage, op.
cit. p. 142.
15. Jeffrey H.
Togay, "Adultery," Encyclopedia Judaica, Vol. II, col. 313. Also, see
Judith Plaskow, Standing Again at Sinai: Judaism from a Feminist Perspective
(New York: Harper & Row Publishers, 1990) pp. 170-177.
16. Hazleton,
op. cit., pp. 41-42.
17. Swidler,
op. cit., p. 141.
18. Matilda J.
Gage, Woman, Church, and State (New York: Truth Seeker Company, 1893) p. 141.
19. Louis M.
Epstein, The Jewish Marriage Contract (New York: Arno Press, 1973) p. 149.
20. Swidler,
op. cit., p. 142.
21. Epstein,
op. cit., pp. 164-165.
22. Ibid., pp.
112-113. See also Priesand, op. cit., p. 15.
23. James A.
Brundage, Law, Sex, and Christian Society in medieval Europe (Chicago:
University of Chicago Press, 1987) p. 88.
24. Ibid., p.
480.
25. R.
Thompson, Women in Stuart England and America (London: Routledge & Kegan
Paul, 1974) p. 162.
26. Mary
Murray, The Law of the Father (London: Routledge, 1995) p. 67.
27. Gage, op.
cit., p. 143.
28. For
example, see Jeffrey Lang, Struggling to Surrender, (Beltsville, MD: Amana
Publications, 1994) p. 167.
29. Elsayyed
Sabiq, Fiqh al Sunnah (Cairo: Darul Fatah lile'lam Al-Arabi, 11th edition,
1994), vol. 2, pp. 218-229.
30.
Abdel-Haleem Abu Shuqqa, Tahreer al Mar'aa fi Asr al Risala (Kuwait: Dar al
Qalam, 1990) pp. 109-112.
31. Leila
Badawi, "Islam", in Jean Holm and John Bowker, ed., Women in Religion
(London: Pinter Publishers, 1994) p. 102.
32. Amir H.
Siddiqi, Studies in Islamic History (Karachi: Jamiyatul Falah Publications, 3rd
edition, 1967) p. 138.
33. Epstein,
op. cit., p. 196.
34. Swidler,
op. cit., pp. 162-163.
35. The Toronto
Star, Apr. 8, 1995.
36. Sabiq, op.
cit., pp. 318-329. See also Muhammad al Ghazali, Qadaya al Mar'aa bin al
Taqaleed al Rakida wal Wafida (Cairo: Dar al Shorooq, 4th edition, 1992) pp.
178-180.
37. Ibid., pp.
313-318.
38. David W.
Amram, The Jewish Law of Divorce According to Bible and Talmud ( Philadelphia:
Edward Stern & CO., Inc., 1896) pp. 125-126.
39. Epstein,
op. cit., p. 219.
40. Ibid, pp
156-157.
41. Muhammad
Abu Zahra, Usbu al Fiqh al Islami (Cairo: al Majlis al A'la li Ri'ayah al
Funun, 1963) p. 66.
42. Epstein,
op. cit., p. 122.
43. Armstrong,
op. cit., p. 8.
44. Epstein,
op. cit., p. 175.
45. Ibid., p.
121.
46. Gage, op.
cit., p. 142.
47. B. Ayshah
Lemu and Fatima Heeren, Woman in Islam (London: Islamic Foundation, 1978) p.
23.
48. Hazleton,
op. cit., pp. 45-46.
49. Ibid., p.
47.
50. Ibid., p.
49.
51. Swidler,
op. cit., pp. 144-148.
52. Hazleton,
op. cit., pp 44-45.
53. Eugene
Hillman, Polygamy Reconsidered: African Plural Marriage and the Christian
Churches (New York: Orbis Books, 1975) p. 140.
54. Ibid., p.
17.
55. Ibid., pp.
88-93.
56. Ibid., pp.
92-97.
57. Philip L.
Kilbride, Plural Marriage ForOur Times (Westport, Conn.: Bergin & Garvey,
1994) pp. 108-109.
58. The Weekly
Review, Aug. 1, 1987.
59. Kilbride,
op. cit., p. 126.
60. John
D'Emilio and Estelle B. Freedman, Intimate Matters: A history of Sexuality in
America (New York: Harper & Row Publishers, 1988) p. 87.
61. Ute
Frevert, Women in German History: from Bourgeois Emancipation to Sexual
Liberation (New York: Berg Publishers, 1988) pp. 263-264.
62. Ibid., pp.
257-258.
63. Sabiq, op.
cit., p. 191.
64. Hillman,
op. cit., p. 12.
65. Nathan Hare
and Julie Hare, ed., Crisis in Black Sexual Politics (San Francisco: Black
Think Tank, 1989) p. 25.
66. Ibid., p.
26.
67. Kilbride,
op. cit., p. 94.
68. Ibid., p.
95.
69. Ibid.
70. Ibid., pp.
9 5-99.
71. Ibid., p.
118.
72. Lang, op.
cit., p. 172.
73. Kilbride,
op. cit., pp. 72-73.
74. Sabiq, op.
cit., pp. 187-188.
75. Abdul
Rahman Doi, Woman in Shari'ah (London: Ta-Ha Publishers, 1994) p. 76.
76. Menachem M.
Brayer, The Jewish Woman in Rabbinic Literature: A Psychosocial Perspective
(Hoboken, N.J: Ktav Publishing House, 1986) p. 239.
77. Ibid., pp.
316-317. Also see Swidler, op. cit., pp. 121-123.
78. Ibid., p.
139.
79. Susan W.
Schneider, Jewish and Female (New York: Simon & Schuster, 1984) p. 237.
80. Ibid., pp.
238-239.
81. Alexandra
Wright, "Judaism", in Holm and Bowker, ed., op. cit., pp. 128-129
82. Clara M.
Henning, "Cannon Law and the Battle of the Sexes" in Rosemary R.
Ruether, ed., Religion and Sexism: Images of Woman in the Jewish and hristian
Traditions (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1974) p. 272.
83. Donald B.
Kraybill, The riddle of the Amish Culture (Baltimore: Johns Hopkins University
Press, 1989) p. 56.
84. Khalil
Gibran, Thoughts and Meditations (New York: Bantam Books, 1960) p. 28.
85. The Times,
Nov. 18, 1993.



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